Tuesday was a bit of a family day for us. We went to the park so Jett could play. It started sprinkling while we were there, so we decided to leave the park and enjoy a rare dinner in a restaurant. Lately, we don't get much fancier than Chik-fil-a, so that's where we ended up.
The topic of expanding our family came up as our little foursome dined on chicken sandwiches and waffle fries. Jett was screaming furiously because he couldn't open a ketchup packet, and Dax was fussing at the idea of his mouth not having a boob in it for five minutes so I can shove some fast-food poultry down my throat.
Needless to say, it was an interesting time to discuss having more children. Interestingly, though, I can't bring myself to say that I'm done. Even now - I'm typing one-handed while I hold Dax, and Jett keeps handing me a McDonald's kid's meal toy, screaming because the rubberband that he insists on having around its head keeps coming off - I want more. I just do.
Tim does not.
No more. None. No mas bebes. If we had the money, he'd find a doctor willing to preform a vasectomy right now, at 11:12pm on a Friday night. He'd be there - pants off, bare butt on the operating table - before I could say "it's okay, honey I'll get an IUD, and we can revisit this later".
I may be exaggerating just a smidge, but he's not far from that.
I'm even willing to wait about ten years. I'd be 35, and the boys would be 12 and 10. They could take care of themselves more effectively, and they might even help out. Tim says that by that point, we'll have our sleep back, no diaper duty, and children that can feed themselves pretty well. So, obviously, we won't want to give that up for another crying, sucking, poop machine. Strangely, I'm still not so sure.
Maybe it was the extremely positive birth experience that I had with Dax (I'm planning to post that birth story here very soon). I absolutely loved giving birth to him. As much as I complained about being pregnant, I wouldn't trade it, and I can't imagine never feeling a baby move in my belly again. Despite the raging nipple pain and engorgement (among other things) associated with breastfeeding, I don't want Dax to be the last baby I nurse.
Maybe it's because I'm completely fascinated by pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and the overall workings of the human body. More specifically, I'm enraptured by the female body - my own body - and its ability to nourish another human from conception on through to breastfeeding and beyond.
Sigh.
I still hold out hope that Tim will change his mind. I don't think he'll feel this way forever. Even if he doesn't, maybe I'll eventually share his sentiment, and we'll both feel happily done having children. We'll see.
Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
World Breastfeeding Week is almost here!
I went to my first LLL meeting last week. For those of you who aren't familiar, La Leche League (LLL, for short) is an international organization providing information and support to breastfeeding mothers. I can't believe I never went to one when I was pregnant with and/or nursing Jett! I can't imagine how that kind of in person, mother-to-mother support system would have positively impacted our nursing relationship. As it is, I probably wouldn't have made it to 11 months without support from numerous online communities.
With World Breastfeeding Week almost upon us, I thought I'd draw some attention to the topic as a whole, and how breastfeeding has changed my life.
Long before I ever became pregnant with Jett, I knew that I would breastfeed. My mother breastfed my brothers and me, all until we were toddlers. When I found out I was pregnant, I never even questioned it - I knew I'd breastfeed.
I never bought any breastfeeding books or attended any breastfeeding classes. I watched my mom do this a thousand times. You just put the baby's mouth on your boob - it can't be that hard, I thought. Of course, the overly confident, uninformed, first-time mom is always the one who encounters every possible problem - low supply, overactive let-down (which rarely accompanies low supply), thrush, poor weight gain (actually, he lost weight), poor latch, which led to cracked, bleeding nipples, followed by a roaring case of mastitis (breast infection), and, ultimately, I had to use something I never thought I'd need - formula.
After being treated for mastitis at one week postpartum and while suffering from an unholy amount of toe-curling pain, I started looking for support. I found Breastfeeding.com, saw a lactation consultant, bought The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, and started educating myself. It was during this period of struggle, searching, and learning that I made an unexpected discovery - this is what I want to do. I want to help women who are struggling with these same issues. It just made sense. It fit. Never before had I felt that I found my "calling", but I found it - even if it was just being there to offer a heart-felt "you can do it!" to a struggling new mom on a message board.
Jett was 11 months old when he weaned, and while I encountered many an issue and used a lot of formula during those 11 months, I still feel that I started as a caterpillar and emerged a beautiful butterfly. We were even able to make it past a pregnancy and miscarriage, which gave the final blow to my milk supply, I believe. Even so, we went on for 3 months after I miscarried.
When I found out I was pregnant with Dax, I made a point to do things differently. I wanted to take every possible precaution to make sure I could breastfeed as soon as possible after he was born (unlike my experience with Jett, wherein I didn't get to nurse him for about 6 hours after he was born). I wanted to have an unmedicated birth with as few interventions as possible. I read everything I could get my hands on. I took classes and found incredible support there. This time, I felt truly confident and empowered. Instead of thinking that I knew everything already, without reading books or taking classes, I actually read the books, took the classes, and educated myself. I was informed, prepared, and ready. Knowledge truly was (and still is) power.
My birth and postpartum experience with Dax was a dream. The labor and delivery was uncomplicated, the birth was almost euphoric, and he latched on perfectly within 30 minutes of being born.
It was incredible. I still get teary eyed when I think about it. After months of struggling with Jett, thinking that my body would never be able to nourish a baby on its own, here we are - 10 weeks out, and Dax weighs over 14 pounds - he was 8 pounds 13 ounces at birth.
I'm still very much interested in starting a career in breastfeeding, perhaps as a counselor, but having two young children has kept me quite busy lately. I'm definitely hoping to further explore that possibility soon.
So, for those of you who were there to support and educate me during my breastfeeding hardships (and triumphs!), I send a heartfelt and long overdue thank you. :)
With World Breastfeeding Week almost upon us, I thought I'd draw some attention to the topic as a whole, and how breastfeeding has changed my life.
Long before I ever became pregnant with Jett, I knew that I would breastfeed. My mother breastfed my brothers and me, all until we were toddlers. When I found out I was pregnant, I never even questioned it - I knew I'd breastfeed.
I never bought any breastfeeding books or attended any breastfeeding classes. I watched my mom do this a thousand times. You just put the baby's mouth on your boob - it can't be that hard, I thought. Of course, the overly confident, uninformed, first-time mom is always the one who encounters every possible problem - low supply, overactive let-down (which rarely accompanies low supply), thrush, poor weight gain (actually, he lost weight), poor latch, which led to cracked, bleeding nipples, followed by a roaring case of mastitis (breast infection), and, ultimately, I had to use something I never thought I'd need - formula.
After being treated for mastitis at one week postpartum and while suffering from an unholy amount of toe-curling pain, I started looking for support. I found Breastfeeding.com, saw a lactation consultant, bought The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, and started educating myself. It was during this period of struggle, searching, and learning that I made an unexpected discovery - this is what I want to do. I want to help women who are struggling with these same issues. It just made sense. It fit. Never before had I felt that I found my "calling", but I found it - even if it was just being there to offer a heart-felt "you can do it!" to a struggling new mom on a message board.
Jett was 11 months old when he weaned, and while I encountered many an issue and used a lot of formula during those 11 months, I still feel that I started as a caterpillar and emerged a beautiful butterfly. We were even able to make it past a pregnancy and miscarriage, which gave the final blow to my milk supply, I believe. Even so, we went on for 3 months after I miscarried.
When I found out I was pregnant with Dax, I made a point to do things differently. I wanted to take every possible precaution to make sure I could breastfeed as soon as possible after he was born (unlike my experience with Jett, wherein I didn't get to nurse him for about 6 hours after he was born). I wanted to have an unmedicated birth with as few interventions as possible. I read everything I could get my hands on. I took classes and found incredible support there. This time, I felt truly confident and empowered. Instead of thinking that I knew everything already, without reading books or taking classes, I actually read the books, took the classes, and educated myself. I was informed, prepared, and ready. Knowledge truly was (and still is) power.
My birth and postpartum experience with Dax was a dream. The labor and delivery was uncomplicated, the birth was almost euphoric, and he latched on perfectly within 30 minutes of being born.
It was incredible. I still get teary eyed when I think about it. After months of struggling with Jett, thinking that my body would never be able to nourish a baby on its own, here we are - 10 weeks out, and Dax weighs over 14 pounds - he was 8 pounds 13 ounces at birth.
I'm still very much interested in starting a career in breastfeeding, perhaps as a counselor, but having two young children has kept me quite busy lately. I'm definitely hoping to further explore that possibility soon.
So, for those of you who were there to support and educate me during my breastfeeding hardships (and triumphs!), I send a heartfelt and long overdue thank you. :)
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Some stuff I made - a baby sling and cloth nursing pads
I've been trying to get the hang of this babywearing thing, so I bought some ring slings and did some sewing. I'm wearing a fake baby, of course. Eventually, I may get the hang of wearing a real baby. That is the goal, after all.
And, of course, as part of my efforts to save money and eliminate waste, I made some cloth nursing pads. This is just a prototype. It's not as contoured as I'd like, so I'll be working on some more.
And, of course, as part of my efforts to save money and eliminate waste, I made some cloth nursing pads. This is just a prototype. It's not as contoured as I'd like, so I'll be working on some more.
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